“We want Pop to grow up more freely and avoid being forced into a specific gender mould from the outset,” Pop’s mother said. “It's cruel to bring a child into the world with a blue or pink stamp on their forehead.”
Here's the truth.
Generally speaking, it is in a girl's biological nature to appreciate being told she is cute.
It is in a boy's biological nature to love showing off his muscle power.
Does this vary by degrees? Yes. Are there exceptions? Yes.
The outliers do not disprove the general biological tendency.
The fact that society reinforces these tendencies doesn't disprove the biological tendency, either.
When you're a boy, being boyish is enjoyable. When you're a girl, being girlish is enjoyable.
Just because a minority doesn't feel that way doesn't mean the generalization is not useful. Or that it's even harmful.
Pop is missing out that part of his or her identity. I think it's a form of deprivation. How do you love being a woman if you're not taught to embrace your femininity? The converse is true for a man.
I think not informing the kid of his identity is cruel.